141 自己给自己找的借口(1 / 2)

恢复晴朗的星空是多么的璀璨,璀璨的覆盖着整个世界,下雨过后的环境总是那么让人感到清爽,骑着小电驴行驶在车来车往的马路,我努力开心着快乐着。【】</p>

现在已经是十一点多了,汤姆睡着了,要写的书也写完了,吃了汤姆给泡的泡面感觉心里暖暖的,不管心情多么不好,能吃上儿子给泡的方便面就是完美的,由于睡了一天,晚上根本睡不着,我便骑着小刀电驴,出来呼吸呼吸新鲜空气。</p>

汤姆告诉我周一要开家长会,也会公布期中考试的成绩,听到汤姆的话时我首先想到的不是汤姆考的怎么样,而是开家长会时李清书会不会替她侄子的爸爸妈妈来,我不禁疑惑,我想这些难道是想要见到她吗?我心里怒骂自己真的好没出息。</p>

其实我也明白,我的心还不能定下来,惆怅的我不知道对李清书的喜欢程度究竟有多深,会这样的留恋,心里明明知道她是送自己进监狱的人,也是特别讨厌自己的人,为什么还会没脸的想念她,当我想到我站在李清书卧室的窗口时说的话,我就告诉自己,一定要坚定的忘记,即使今天忘不了,可以是明天,明天忘不了,可以是明天的明天,我相信我必定会将李清书的记忆抹除,不再为她羁绊......</p>

喜欢与不喜欢之间总是难以割舍,天际的星辰与街头的路灯更是无法区别,无法区别究竟哪种光芒才是最好的,我骑着小巧玲珑的小刀电驴,行驶在积水干枯的路面,穿梭在无数灯光点亮的街头,形形色色的人,豪华与廉价的车,不管是他秀着肱二头肌,还是她扭动着肥臀,皆都映入我的眼底,却不能掀起所谓的涟漪,我的脑海终究还是她,我仿佛中毒了,好像魔怔了,总之从仇恨到喜欢她,脑海里都是她,难道是我上一辈子欠了她吗?让我这一世彻底的陷入所谓的泥泞漩涡中难以自拔?</p>

努力想要忘却李清书的我,穿梭了无数个街头,却是不知不觉的来到了杭州别墅区的这条路,当我看到熟悉的路况,立刻停下了小刀电驴,脑海立刻思绪万千起来,我看着近在咫尺的豪华别墅区,苦笑的摇摇头,喃喃道:“真他妈也是醉了......”</p>

我立刻就要掉头回去,可是刚用了力气,刚有了动作,我却感觉全身乏力,无力瞬间弥漫了全身。</p>

“有点想抽烟了,去超市买包烟吧。”</p>

我对自己说道,肯定了想法之后,全身便立刻有了力气,手掌紧紧握住手把,扭动了手把,小刀电驴立刻便是冲进了被一盏盏间隔不过几米距离的路灯群点亮的夜幕,因为什么?因为自己给自己找的借口......</p>

这是今天第二次来到别墅区,轻车熟路的骑着电驴进入小区中,我来到小区的超市,真的买了一包烟,虽然从来不抽烟,但身边的朋友都抽烟,自然而然买了一包比较廉价的红塔山,同时买了个一块钱的塑料打火机,还买了一袋脆脆肠,买了个鸡腿,买了瓶水,我不知为何刚刚吃了饭的我为什么要买这些吃的,现在的我自己都不知道自己在想着些什么?自己也搞不懂自己。</p>

不过超市的收银员长得挺好看的,我不免多看了她几眼,当然只是欣赏而已,走出超市,手里提着塑料袋,准备骑着电驴出小区,可是将写着豪华超市四个字的塑料袋挂在车把上的时候,我又一次无力了,已经触及着黑色车钥匙的手好像连转动的力气都没有,所谓的力气莫名其妙的消失了,操控力气的大脑只是传来了空白的回答。</p>

“好像还没有好好看看这个杭州最大的小区,难不准以后在杭州定居了要在这里买一套大别墅呢,先探探路吧,反正也是无事。”</p>

我从车座上站起身,望着座座**的奢侈别墅,喃喃道。</p>

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