第三章 屋盟山婚介所(1 / 2)

很快,山大王痴情守望小和尚的话题传遍了屋盟山的每一个角落,大妖小妖都八卦的津津有味。 </p>

听到这事的时候,余鲤正拿着把瓜子蹲在树下研究菜谱,一时间笑得合不拢嘴,手里的瓜子撒了大半。惹得树精一脸正经道:“文明休息,注意保持卫生。” </p>

“知道了,知道了。” </p>

余鲤依旧笑得开心,“痴情山大王,这个人物我喜欢,要我说,还得有一个强抢小和尚的情节才带劲,快,让文笔好的写出个话本来,好让我无聊时候打发时间用。” </p>

要说余鲤的感情事,屋盟山的一干妖精都上心的很,一来是不忍心看她成为大龄剩妖孤独终老,二来是隔壁山头的老泥鳅经常来屋盟上找余鲤表白,那老泥鳅化成人时想来也是没有一个好的参照物,一张脸长的像个冤案,谁见了都得叫声丑,每次都让余鲤带头撵了回去。 </p>

新来的小和尚就不一样了,虽然说是个凡人,但是架不住长得好看啊,配他们山大王正好。于是屋盟山一众妖精众志成城,为了余鲤的终身大事各显神通。 </p>

于是,在未来的一段日子里,宁静的竹屋每天都能迎来清晨第一缕鸡飞狗跳的阳光。 </p>

“小和尚,你跟咱聊聊,你说余鲤吧,性格是大大咧咧,但是长的绝对看得过去,也没做过什么伤天害理,鸡鸣狗盗的事,还勤勤恳恳致力于屋盟山的建设,还获得屋盟山三好妖精的称号,要我说你就凑活凑活吧。” </p>

“……” </p>

“兄弟,你说你现在漂泊,无亲无故,不得需要一个保镖保驾护航?余鲤成精最早,武力高强,绝对能保你平安无虞,要我说,你们就是天生一对。哎?你先别下锄头,那是我家老幺,今儿个才长出来,傻孩子,锄头来了也不知道躲着点。” </p>

纵使元衍多么的淡定,但是面对这满竹林聒噪的妖精,向来没什么表情的脸上也多少有些龟裂。 </p>

竹屋前出现了屋盟山一大景观,各色的精怪围着元衍跑前跑后,此势头甚至要比当年余鲤带领小弟占领山头的场面还要壮观许多。 </p>

这可不是元衍妖缘好,真相是一群山野狸猫用尽毕生口舌浑身解数说服元衍跟余鲤在一起,什么“一见钟情非君不嫁”一系列丧良心的话脸不红,心不跳的脱口而出,听的余鲤只想找条河扎进去。 </p>

身处包围圈的元衍逃脱不得,额头青筋隐隐凸起,后来干脆打坐念经,企图把声音尽数隔离。 </p>

再过两天,一只黑熊精找上门来,一度黑墙瞬间挡住了元衍面前的阳光,踩得地上微晃,然后大掌一拍,震得竹门嘎吱响。 </p>

元衍眼见竹门不堪重负,终于屈服于黑熊精的蛮力之下,“砰”的一声砸在地上,让他无奈地叹了口气。 </p>

黑熊精不绕弯子,扯着粗犷的嗓音朝着元衍喊: </p>

“我可不是来劝你的,我是想告诉你,我可是喜欢大王好多年了,平白被你截了胡,鬼知道她怎么能看上你这个肩不能扛,手不能提的小白脸,想我英明神武,魁梧有力,迷倒这周围多少的母妖精。要我说,你识趣点,离我们大王远一点。” </p>

说着就要用他那一双熊掌去拍元衍的肩,这下余鲤不能躲着看戏了,万一这一爪子下去再将他打出个好歹,急忙从树后钻出来,揪着黑熊的耳朵扯到河边,一脚踹了下去。无视黑熊幽怨的眼神,余鲤讪讪一笑,抱歉地说道: </p>

“这黑熊最近刚失恋,难受着呢,经常胡言乱语,屋盟山好久没进过生人,他们也就兴奋了些,你可千万不要在意,都是误会,误会。嘿嘿!” </p>

“无碍。” </p>

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