第1章 穿成流浪狗?!(1 / 2)

狼皇 爱吃辣鸡粉 0 字 2021-05-24

萧云第三次睁开眼睛,绝望地发现出现在他视线中的依然不是他卧室里的节能灯,而是可用天高云淡形容、一眼看不到边的蔚蓝天空。

这肯定不是萧云老家的天,在城市中长大的萧云上次看到这么蓝的天还是小学时去乡下舅舅家玩的时候了——好吧,不用分辨天空颜色萧云也知道他现在的情况很不对劲,因为他现在是趴在地上、把脑袋枕在手臂上睡觉的姿势,不……或许应该说前爪?他这对伸向前方、交叉着叠在草地上的前肢……和他家楼下邻居养的那条萨摩耶前爪相似度起码得有九成……

“——我特嘛睡梦中灵魂离体附身到条狗身上了?!”

这是萧云思考过后唯一能想到的现实。

僵了数秒后,萧云试图站起身……他感觉到自己的双腿从趴地面上到曲起来收到腹下、再完成站立动作的过程,这期间交叉叠在身前的双爪也自然立起、撑起了他的身体——卧槽果然是四肢站立啊啊啊啊啊!!还起身得这么流畅自然,这特嘛就是所谓的身体记忆吗?!

大张着嘴的萧云想要发出发泄情绪的咆哮,然后他就非常自然地发出了一声:“嗷呜~~~~”

“……狗是这么叫的?”大脑一片空白的萧云,迟缓地冒出这么个念头,他慢慢低下头看向自己的身体……嗯,脖子比是人类的时候灵活多了,活动范围相当大,他能看见自己的身体体表长着厚实的长绒毛,胸口这块尤其茂密,就是毛上非常脏、沾了不知道多少泥灰草叶啥的……

双手双脚……呃,前肢后肢长得也像狗爪子,从比例来看身体四肢比较修长健壮,不是细犬,而是大型犬的那种,再抬起一只前爪……呃,还是相当脏,不过确实能看见肉垫……

萧云附体的这条狗,浑身上下都脏,脏到看不出本色,胸口、腹部、四肢上挺多毛都打结了,不用照镜子看整体萧云都猜得到自己现在是啥德性。

“我特嘛不止变成狗,还变成流浪狗?!”萧云更觉悲从中来,“这特么——人家穿成猫好歹还附带铲屎的呀!老子穿成狗就这么坑?!”

感觉特别悲催的萧云一下失去力气重新瘫回地上,别说,狗的身体这么趴着的时候还挺放松……就是,青草味道之间好像还夹杂着一些让人不快的、似乎是排泄物之类的玩意儿的气味……

没意识到之前没感觉,一旦意识到这些气味萧云便立马觉得自己的鼻子快烂了,他下意识地就想先把鼻子捂住,然后他就发现自己卖萌地抬起前肢、搭在了自个儿的(狗)脸上……

萧云:“……”

吗的他的前爪上好像也有排泄物的气味……不但没挡住臭气,气味还更重了。

“啊啊啊啊我不想当狗我要回家——”萧云崩溃了,放弃自我地在地上打起了滚,“闹哪样啊明天还要上班呢快让我回去嗷嗷嗷嗷~~~~”

折腾得地面草叶翻飞的萧云,整个人(狗)忽然僵住。

他刚才崩溃之下把话喊出来了,不是心理活动,就像人在自个儿房间里呆着的时候忽然想起某些羞耻记忆会忍不住抱头呐喊恨不得打shi当时的自己一样,发声器官会下意识地喊出心声——

他好像听到某个特别陌生又似乎颇为熟悉的嗓音发出了他的声音。

“……狗会说话?”萧云试着自言自语,流畅的普通话从他的嘴里飙了出来,声音不是他的声音,但吐字特别清晰、特别字正腔圆。

“啊!”萧云倒抽口冷气,再次卖萌地抬起前肢捧起狗脸,“真特嘛能发声啊——卧槽这是什么品种的狗?!”

……稍待片刻。

萧云默默起身,身体很自然地……像狗甩水那样抖掉毛上沾的草叶之类的东西,又费力地、很不习惯地拿爪子扒拉掉身上比较大块的泥块——让他真的跟狗一样拿舌头去舔他是绝对做不到的。

稍微清理下身上,萧云坚强地站起来,抬头望向四周,他这条流浪狗好像是被人丢到荒郊野外了,举目望去全是一望无际的平原绿地,稍微有些起伏的小山丘看上去也不太高,光看地势,萧云就能肯定这地方绝不是他还是人的时候住的南方老家……他老家出门就是山,没出过省的萧云从来没看见过这么宽这么平的地儿。

“虽然不知道被丢到哪了……应该还是在地球上吧,如果能遇到人的话我这狗的声带还能发出人声,要不能不被解剖切片的话……或许还能想办法回家……”萧云尽量乐观地想着,抬爪往前行走,别说,四条腿移动起来还很平稳,肉垫接触草地和穿了空气鞋一样,身上虽脏但是厚密的毛发让他不怕被草叶割到,就是偶尔被茂盛的草叶刮到鼻子啥的会挺不舒服……

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